How can anyone...

I was wondering all night how can anyone treat their life with so much little respect it's really great to be alive... I don't think I have the heart to hurt myself because my boyfriends friend reminds me of so much of how I felt when no one loved me always wanting to be alone writing one suicide note after another... And even trying to cut myself out of a impulse I told him I would care if he died... When really he is right about me not knowing just one damn thing about him... But what does it matter if we know each other or not... I still care and once I make a friend I genuinely end up caring for them... Hoping that they won't feel similar pains to I have in the passed.... But I am also confused as to why... He would want to end his life... Not to mention his friends would care for him... I don't know how to talk to him and the words he said saying that he was questioning if Andrews phone is really shut off pissed me off. Weirdo really angers me I can't even stop thinking about him trying to end his life.... Or even to the words he said about Andrew.... Angered me the most. I don't know why but I am starting to hate the fact that weirdo thinks I don't care the fact he will hurt him self I am his friend what hurts the most is you call for someone to listen to you but you don't consider them as a friend? ... Fine I give up being friends... Andrew this is making it very hard to breath I wish I was right next to you right now... I can't stop thinking about this futile topic that I know is useless and I can't help regardless of what.