Confused

Okay well its been a while I just wanted to break down something but I don't really know and am not sure about even though I have been saying I love you to my boyfriend I have been feeling distant and distances from a person and not getting to talk to them can hurt and then you will not be able to have that lovely beating feeling well I think the only reason why is because my realtionship has been put on a stop I think its like our love dovey self has been put on a stop for a reason and I think everything becomes fine when I see my boyfreind's body or hear his voice and everything the akward part is that my body reacts when he says "I love you" I just get this funny feeling and then I get sad again because I can't hug him I feel it would be so different if we where able to physically touch each other. I must say I do hate long distances relationships now because I wanna fucking kiss him already not to mention that I wanna just hug him physically. Everyone thinks that long distances is hard it is only hard if you make it out to be I love my babe with all my heart its just I feel lonely and then its kinda hard to get lovey dovey again which is why I suggest can he try to keep in contact me more... I wonder if my babe misses me a lot... sometimes I wonder maybe he forgets about me... and I do question him about his love for me where as he doesn't for me he has utmost confidence and I am just freaking scared I screw up on him expectation towards me I wonder when he dated me if he had expectations towards me... other than that my babe he normally has no problem in proving that he loves me... weather it was to stay up that night, wake me up in the morning for school (stuff he use to do before he started working.) I am kind of annoyed though that work and school has become his main objective before his health which does piss me off cause he promise me he would take care of himself. I haven't typed like this in a while so if I loose some of you readers in what I am saying sorry. But I just think that I wonder if it will be easy to readjust if we didn't have so much things on our mind I am not saying I want to not go out with him I am just saying how about we give eachother a break so that we could get our own lives in order and then come back to our love dovey state when we finished with everything we must do of course that means when we are working if one feels down we can help one another I really love him he IS SO DAMN COOL >////> I am angry with myself about saying "TTYL" on facebook to him when I meant that to my other friend who was messaging me and I was doing homework untop of that :\
 The bad thing is since I was on his case for not talking to me much I have been having dreams like bad ones like one time I had a dream he yelled at me and the other time he was like what the fuck did you do... it was the first time I saw him that mad at me.. and untop of that he was kissing another girl .. in my dreams ( that one I know won't happen_) but I was so angry at thoughs and I took it out on him... I kept doubting him its my fault I keep thinking about stupid things I got this other weird dream where he punched a brick wall at the side of my shoulder and it was scary...