Why did this happen...?

For one split second i think we would of got to talk but in the end I got knight in trouble I hope he doesn't... Does his brother not accept me as knights girlfriend am I a bad person..... I am kinda holding tears especially when he starts school he will busy and not be able to talk to me... I guess I don't know what I should do.... I do not want to be alone or not be able to talk to knight tomorrow because Thursday.... I still won't be able to talk to him..... I do have a low self esteem it's true .... But maybe the thing I really want people to see is I am not smart, pretty, and have a nice heart but if you ever need help I am always their to assist you. I really hate the miles we are apart what I would kill to be in his school. I hope knight didn't get grounded I am stressing like crazy -sighs- I wonder if he is okay cause he isn't picking up my cell phone calls